another Visionoir tale

by Rodolfo de Matteis



the Sixth of January 2011

The night is awesome, wonderful, a never seen amount of stars coming down to the very line of the horizon, so much that you can’t say if they are stars or lights from the houses, but they’re no houses in the desert, at least not so many. The girl marched many miles all the day to get here, she is alone, full of joy, put up her camping tent and lighted her fire, she can’t sleep, she never saw so many stars, she lives in the city, and nearly she can’t believe the stars be so many, in clouds, in sprays, as huge rivers they have the sky more white than black, white of the silent pulsation of the stars, of their vibrating whites blues and yellows.

A star moves in the midst of the others, the girls doesn’t know what it is, only she’s watching in awe it approaching in the night, then realizing its speed she thinks to a flying saucer; when she hears the noise of the engine the airplane had already crossed half of the sky; and she feels it’s impossible that even here the airplanes reach, in the desert, in the middle of nowhere.

From faraway the soldiers recognize well the camp fire of the girl, it’s so in the open, so near to the road, and their well trained eyes don’t confuse it with a low star. They are here for the War on Drugs, that war that has already 30 thousands dead people in the last years of the calderón “presidency”, a young generations genocide according to the ONU; they are here to check the desert by night, may any narco-car pass by driving north to the border to the dollars; and so they decide to go and see what’s going on, while sharing a bottle of tequila the three need to seize more cocaine, it’ nearly finished and they don’t want absolutely take the risk to stay with dry nostrils, inhaling only the dust of the desert that the jeep raises while going around.

The girls hears the noise approaching just when she was making herself a joint, at first it is only a deaf far noise… she thinks of a hallucination, then she thinks of an airplane, then of a train bringing its mysterious loads north to Texas, so many of them already have passed by during this magic night. But the noise approaches more, like an engine, a shiver run along the spine of the girl, just now she realizes to be alone, the stars are dumb don’t speak don’t reassure her don’t’ help. Suddenly she saws the headlights approaching implacably through the night, do the last turns and they are there, she hides the joint under the sand, but when she saws the uniforms she feels more quiet, they are not the drunk farmers she thought at first, afraid of any arm.

The first soldier to get down from the car nearly can’t believe to his eyes: the girl is so beautiful, blonde, wearing so light dresses, nearly transparent ones, quiet dressed of nothing, and her legs are so nice, their naked skin shines in the light of the fire, and that puddle of shadow in between just there in the middle of her thighs, a dark shadow that promises promises promises. The soldier listens his drunk breath becoming heavier, the heart knocking hard and rising up as if it will explode inside his head, and then, as soon as he feels the scent of marijuana in the air, he springs and catches the girl by the hair, so nice so blonde so soft and thin those hairs, and so alien to him. The poor girl cries as a chicken brought to be butchered and her legs and buttocks get wounded and are leaving tracks of blood on the stones and the thorns while he drags her around, kicking her.

The other soldiers stop him, are you crazy?
They say, don’t ruin this flower, this fucking junky whore has to pay as they pay those of her kind, damned narcos!

They snatch her from his hands and tear her dresses, naked she looks even more beautiful, those small breasts of her, so slim so thin that body of dragonfly: one catches her by the nape and bends her doggy style trying to put the barrel of his rifle right into her ass in the midst of the yells of terror and incredulity of her and the laughter of joy of the other soldiers. One takes out his dick from the pants and approaches her face saying, suck it bitch! while he slams it on her cheeks, but he doesn’t stand to watch the other one that, yes! he managed to put inside her the rifle that disappears between her legs, where blood is running now abundantly, and so he explodes and comes.
The girls feels his semen, warm salty sticky, and so disgusting on her face that she vomits, and cries and screams, No! Mercy! Why? What do I did to you? And so behave fucking bitch! whore on heat, have us enjoy! 

And they keep her supine with open legs while he takes out the bloody rifle and puts inside the dick, slobbering sweating oozing tequila and the scent of coke in his nostrils is mixing up with the scent of her fear and her blood and it excites him more and more and soon he comes exploding inside her. Then the other two push him away and rape her in turns: their prey, the damned gangster, the fucking drug-addict, the enemy.


I had seen that camp fire for hours from above from the hill, I didn’t approach it, I didn’t want to ruin my trip with the silly chatters of the people. I knew they couldn’t see me, my camp fire was quit hidden in a small depression between the hills, and very far from the road that, even if unpaved, passes down. I was able to look their fire only while walking a bit far from my camp to piss or to watch the darkness of the desert. I was quiet satisfied that they were not doing noise, have not brought a stereo, and were not exploding in laughter to disturb the peace of mine, silent being of the desert. When I listened the engine approaching I thought the poor campers will be disturbed by drunk desert farmers longing to chatter with somebody new, or by the police, always chasing for money. I feel safe so far, but anyway I let my fire die, an expert eye could discern his glare, and I focus on stars watching.

Suddenly the yells, so strong so insane so intense, a voice of woman who screams, and she’s screaming really for life or death, it smells of madness of fear of violence up to here that cry so absurd so agonizing and those grunts those scowling voices that I am hearing and that dreadful laughter. The call of that woman’s cry ring in my veins that pump up immediately and stirs the blood in an ancestral explosion: I put on my shoes, catch the machete I use to cut wood, and I run run run downhill without thinking without think anything just smelling adrenaline and the yells calling me.

They don’t see me coming, it looks like the damned ones have her tamed and she is there four legged sucking the dick to one of them while another is raping her from the back screaming of pleasure. The one standing aside that now is just watching and drinking from the bottle is the first to fall down, my blow from the back from the north is so strong that nearly has him beheaded with a single stroke my machete while his blood splashes everywhere the beast-man falls down with the head grotesquely hanging from one side only, and the blood splashing in the face of the other one, the one who was having it in the mouth of the girl, has him blinded and so I jump and strike the machete on his left shoulder breaking his collar bone, but my blade so hungry of his hearth jams there and I cannot take it out and in this very moment a blow in the back leaves me breathless and I think to be done, dead ready, while more kicks look like breaking my back apart.  

And suddenly nothing, only the wild yells of the girls. I turn and see her that keeps going at the soldier wielding the rifle with the hands, muddy of the blood of her rape still fresh on the barrel, while the butt of the rifle strikes again and again on the already opened head of the soldier, and the yells of her.
Calm down, it’s finished! I say, you’re safe now! But some time is needed before she stops to strike the head of him yet reduced mincemeat.The other one with the machete deep in the shoulder is unconscious perhaps dead. We start to shake as leaves in the wind and the pain to be terrible in my back and we hug each other weeping and we stay like this for an infinite time.

Then I say, we have to run, runaway and fast, fast, fast! I take the tequila bottle from the floor and I finish it in a single gulp and so I think: the tent, the things, we need to have everything disappeared, everything that may identify us, and disappear ourselves, go faraway faraway faraway, get dressed let’s go!
She obeys without speaking only weeping all brimmed with blood semen and tears, and soon we have everything on the jeep, and… fuck the machete! My fingerprints on the machete! Yours on the rifle!The soldier jumps and sobs when I’m taking out the machete from his body helping myself with two feet and two hands, and so I strike him again with the machete just in the middle of his fucking head and we go, the jeep has still the key in the dashboard.

Fast, before the sun rises we have to bury everything far from here, have any trace of blood washed aways, throw this damned jeep in a hidden solitary ravine, and jump on a train that will bring us faraway, as far as possible.




Rodolfo de Matteis, Mexico City, January 6th 2011
Translated from the original Italian by the author on February 8th 2011